Teach Me How To Adult
Gillian Berner
Teach Me How To Adult tackles the deep questions that help us know ourselves, and each other, a little better… how do we have better conversations? How do we grow together in our relationships, instead of apart? How do we stay optimistic when the world is a dumpster fire? Are we really in a loneliness epidemic? How do we cultivate more awe? Why are everyone’s hormones so out of whack? Is everyone having more sex than me? Join host and writer Gillian Berner every week for expert interviews and meaningful conversations on the growth, changes, and transitions of adulthood. Wherever you are on your journey, we’re here to figure out the messiness of being human, together.
Teach Me How To Adult tackles the deep questions that help us know ourselves, and each other, a little better… how do we have better conversations? How do we grow together in our relationships, instead of apart? How do we stay optimistic when the world is a dumpster fire? Are we really in a loneliness epidemic? How do we cultivate more awe? Why are everyone’s hormones so out of whack? Is everyone having more sex than me? Join host and writer Gillian Berner every week for expert interviews and meaningful conversations on the growth, changes, and transitions of adulthood. Wherever you are on your journey, we’re here to figure out the messiness of being human, together.
Why You Take Everything Personally (And How To Stop Believing It’s Always About You)
Episodes
Why do we take everything so personally? Do you overthink text messages, assume someone's upset with you when they're just having a bad day, or interpret feedback as proof you're not good enough? If you constantly read into other people's behaviour and assume the worst, this episode is a must-listen. This week, I share how I've been working on taking things less personally, managing rejection sensitivity, and overcoming the social hypervigilance that can cause us to read into every single interaction. I explore the psychology behind why we’re so quick to perceive rejection and criticism, even when it has literally nothing to do with us. We cover practical strategies and reframes to stop taking things personally, including how to separate facts from the stories you're telling yourself, assuming positive intent, and getting curious about the other, instead of immediately turning inward and overanalyzing. The goal definitely isn't to stop being a sensitive person or pretend you don't have feelings (I really do believe my sensitivity is a superpower)… it's to stop interpreting every unanswered text, cancelled plan, or bad mood as evidence that you aren’t loved, accepted, or included. Ultimately, not everything is about you—and that’s a good thing. Remembering that it’s usually not personal can free up SO MUCH mental energy and allow you to be more present in your life. You can be a sensitive person who cares deeply about your relationships without taking responsibility for every little thing people do. Tune in to learn about: Why some people are more sensitive to perceived rejection, criticism, and exclusion Rejection sensitivity and social hypervigilance: why we monitor other people's moods and behaviour The impact on taking things personally in every pillar of life The spotlight effect and why we overestimate how much other people notice us How to separate what actually happened from the stories and assumptions you're creating Why we fall into mind-reading, overthinking, and rumination when we feel rejected or insecure The power of assuming positive intent and considering other person’s circumstances Why getting curious, asking questions, and communicating directly changes everything How to manage emotional reactivity without suppressing your feelings Practical questions to help challenge anxious assumptions For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
If modern dating feels like an episode of Black Mirror, you're not alone. So we're throwing it back to dating advice that can help you date smarter and build healthy relationships that last. Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from an episode that you might have missed. Relationship expert Amy Chan breaks down the toxic dating patterns that can keep people from finding the relationships they want, the mistakes singles are most commonly making, and how to stop self-sabotaging your love life. Plus, Amy’s Dating Funnel framework for approaching your dating life with clarity and confidence. Amy has been a trusted voice in modern relationships for almost two decades. She’s the author of UNSINGLE: How to Date Smarter and Create Love that Lasts (which comes out this April 28th!) and her popular first book, Breakup Bootcamp: The Science of Rewiring Your Heart, was featured in The New York Times. She’s the founder Renew Breakup Bootcamp, the world's first heartbreak retreat, and she’s on faculty at Esalen and The Omega Institute. Listen to the full episode with Amy here! Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes. Follow Amy on Instagram and her website. You can order her new book, Unsingle, here. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
Why is it so damn hard to make decisions? And why are we so afraid of making the wrong choice? If you overthink every option, struggle with decision anxiety, second-guess yourself, or feel like you’re always chasing 100% certainty, this episode is for you. Whether you’re questioning your relationship, contemplating a career change, navigating a major life transition, or struggling with everyday choices, the fear of making the wrong decision can feel paralyzing. So I called in licensed therapist, Jenna Overbaugh, to talk about overcoming analysis, ending the anxiety loop that keeps us stuck in decision-making, and building the confidence and self-trust to stick to our decisions… even when we feel uncertain. My biggest takeaway? Self-trust isn't knowing you'll make the "perfect" decision — it's knowing you can handle the consequences of an imperfect one. We explore the fantasy of the “perfect life”, why endlessly researching, analyzing, and seeking reassurance can worsen decision anxiety, how cognitive distortions can skew our perception of our options, and how to build your tolerance for uncertainty. The goal isn't to make decisions you’ll never regret. It’s to become someone who trusts themselves to handle uncertainty, discomfort, and whatever happens next. By the end of this episode, I hope you’ll have a roadmap for developing self-trust, without waiting until you feel completely ready. Jenna Overbaugh is an internationally recognized expert in OCD, anxiety disorders, and intrusive thoughts. She has worked at world-renowned treatment facilities, and her work reaches hundreds of thousands of people through her courses, her popular social media channels, and her podcast/Substack. Her debut book, Making Peace With A Noise Mind, is coming this February. Tune in to learn about: Decision anxiety and analysis paralysis: why we get stuck trying to find the perfect choice How to overcome the fear of making the wrong decision, and choose based on your values How to distinguish your feelings and intuition from your anxiety How to build self-trust and increase your tolerance discomfort What to do when your brain gets stuck in “what if” thinking How to tell the difference between productive problem-solving and overthinking or rumination How to navigate doubts about big life choices, like your partner, your career, or your kids Understanding cognitive distortions, like black-and-white thinking and mental filtering What exposure and response prevention (ERP) is and how it can help with anxiety, OCD, and uncertainty Why you don't need to feel completely ready or confident before making a meaningful change Resources mentioned: https://jennaoverbaughlpc.com/ The Yerkes Dodson Curve For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
Are you deep in the infatuation stage? Or is your relationship stuck in the power struggle of trying to change each other, trying to protect your independence, or falling into an avoidant-pursuer dynamic? It turns out, we all have to go through that phase. Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from an episode that you might have missed. We're throwing it back to invaluable advice from renowned relationship repair expert Baya Voce, MSW, on how to move through the three stages of relationships to land in the healthy spaciousness of interdependence. We talk about the journey from infatuation, to power struggle, to disillusionment, to interdependence, with proven tools and insights for transforming conflict into deeper connection. If you’re in love, want love, or care about love, this is the guide we all need for working towards interdependence, and creating love that lasts. With an MSW from Columbia University, Baya specializes in couples counselling and MDMA-assisted couples therapy research, and is supervised by Esther Perel. Her work has been featured in a TED Talk, on Vice, Forbes, MTV, and ABC, and her videos on everything from boundaries, to using AI for therapy, to navigating jealousy, have been viewed by millions. Listen to the full episode with Baya here! Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes. Resources & Links: Follow Baya on Instagram: @bayavoce Baya’s website: https://bayavoce.com/ Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
Trigger warning: This episode discusses sexual assault, trauma, and survivor experiences. Please take care of yourself and skip this one if you need to. I’ve been thinking a lot about the Cornell 7 case recently, and how, a decade after the #MeToo movement, we’re still seeing the same backlash, criticism, victim-blaming, and lack of understanding about what actually happens to so many people during and after a traumatic experience. So today, in hopes of creating more compassion and understanding in how we respond to victims who experience trauma, we’re unpacking the psychology of trauma responses — and why the ways people react to fear and coercion are so often misunderstood. We hear a lot about the fight-or-flight response, but what happens when your body freezes, shuts down, or tries to appease the threat? In this episode, we explore the two lesser-understood survival responses: freeze and fawn. Fawning is when someone tries to stay safe by placating, appeasing, or complying with a threat. Freezing is a mental or physical shutdown that can involve immobility, silence, numbness, or dissociation. These trauma responses are not conscious choices. When someone freezes instead of fights, that isn’t evidence of consent. These are involuntary responses to perceived danger, shaped by our nervous system, past experiences, and the circumstances we find ourselves in. Whether you’re trying to make sense of your own experience, support someone you love, or better understand the psychology of trauma responses, I hope this offers some clarity and compassion. Tune in to learn about: How trauma responses actually work Why survivors of a traumatic experience may freeze, shut down, dissociate, or be unable to fight back What fawning is, why we appease or comply when we feel threatened, and how people-pleasing can become a survival response The shame, guilt, and self-blame that often accompanies freezing or fawning How social conditioning around politeness and people-pleasing can shape women's responses to threatening situations Why processing and reporting sexual assault is so difficult How to respond with more compassion and understanding when someone shares a traumatic experience If you’re struggling with a traumatic experience, please talk to someone you love and trust, or visit a resource like RAINN.org for support. For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
What if your burnout isn’t just a sign that you’re doing too much... but that you’re living a life that no longer feels like you? Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from one of our guests that you might have missed. We explore the difference between burnout caused by overwork and the deeper exhaustion that comes from misalignment (AKA the fulfillment ache): performing a role, chasing success or following expectations that leave you disconnected from yourself. We’re joined by career coach (to ambitious leaders like Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez), author, and former Google executive Megan Hellerer to learn why the answer isn’t always to do less, and how to reconnect with the things that make you feel alive through small, low-pressure experiments. If you feel burnt out even after taking on less and resting more, this is a much-needed reminder on how finding meaning and alignment can be the crucial missing step. Listen to the full episode with Megan here. Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes. For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
If you feel like you never have enough time, like there just aren’t enough hours in the day, this episode is for you. Because when we intentionally prioritize and plan, even the busiest people can find more time for the things they actually want to do. I’ve been really struggling to get a handle on my own time lately. Between everything I need to do, want to do and feel like I should do, it feels impossible to keep up. So if we all have the same 24 hours in a day, why do some people manage demanding careers, families, relationships and personal goals, while others feel like they’re perpetually running out of time? Time management expert Laura Vanderkam joins me to unpack why so many of us feel constantly busy, overwhelmed and behind… and how to reclaim our time, prioritize the life we want to be living, and build a greater sense of time abundance without trying to optimize every minute with “bro productivity hacks”. Laura Vanderkam has spent over 15 years studying how people actually spend their time, drawing on large-scale research and her own time-tracking experiments to understand the relationship between time, productivity and our perception of busyness. She’s written multiple books including her latest, Big Time: A Simple Path to Time Abundance, in which she explores how we can shift away from a mindset of time scarcity and make more room for the things that matter. Laura also hosts two podcasts, and her work has been featured in The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, The Today Show, in her viral TED Talk, and on shows like The Mel Robbins Podcast. Tune in to learn about: Time scarcity vs. time abundance: Why we feel like we never have enough time, what the research reveals about how we actually spend our hours, and how to change our relationship with time. Rethink your hours: Why we should plan our lives in week-long cycles rather than in 24-hour increments. The biggest time-management mistakes we make: Why we misjudge where our time goes, overestimate the things we don’t want to do, and underestimate the things we want to make time for. The habits of high performers: How to manage a full, demanding life, with sustainable routines and minimal decision fatigue The “golden hours” you might be missing: Making better use of the most overlooked pockets of time in your schedule. Revenge bedtime procrastination: Why we stay up late to reclaim our personal time. Phone use and wasted time: The digital hobby that wastes our time, robbing us of our attention, real hobbies, and leisure. Creating a resilient schedule: Why we should pre-schedule “rain dates” and plan for things to go wrong. To-do lists and ruthless prioritization: How to decide what deserves your time when everything feels important, and Laura’s rule for to-do lists. Choosing intentionally: Why the stories we tell ourselves about our time and priorities matter. Complexity isn’t chaos: Why having a full life isn’t the problem… chaotic planning is. Why you don’t need to choose: Laura’s philosophy on why we shouldn’t have to “give up” time with friends or time at the gym when you’re busy with work or parenting. This conversation goes way deeper than productivity. It’s about intentionally choosing the way you want to live. Because the goal isn’t simply to simplify or to get more done… it’s to spend more time living a fulfilling life. You may not be able to create more hours in the day, but you can rethink how you use them. Follow Laura: https://lauravanderkam.com/ https://lauravanderkam.com/before-breakfast-podcast/ Buy Laura's latest book here Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
Why is literally everything we interact with daily made of plastic and chemicals?? And since avoiding them all is impossible, which ones are most toxic to us? Toxicologist Dr. Yvonne Burkart joins me to separate the science from the fear. We break down the everyday chemicals and endocrine disruptors we're exposed to through food packaging, plastics, cookware, personal care products, fragrance, cleaning products, clothing, drinking water and more—and which changes are actually worth making. We talk about phthalates, PFAS and “forever chemicals,” microplastics, and what the research says about their impact on our hormones, fertility, cancer risk, and overall health. The good news? This isn’t a doomsday episode… there’s a lot of hope to be found in just a few adjustments, and Dr. Burkart shares the biggest changes she personally made to drastically improve her own health and fertility journey. Dr. Yvonne Burkart, PhD, is a toxicologist and environmental health advocate specializing in reproductive and environmental toxicology. She is the author of the forthcoming book, The Low-Tox Solution: Simple Steps to Detoxify Your Body, Home and Environment, and she shares her valuable insights on her popular YouTube channel and on podcasts like Diary Of A CEO. Tune in to learn about: What “toxic load” actually means and how much exposure we’re getting from the products we interact with daily The difference between endocrine disruptors, phthalates, PFAS (“forever chemicals”), and microplastics How toxins impact hormones, fertility, PCOS, and sperm health Understanding toxin exposure and cancer risk The surprising research on generational toxin impact, how exposure in pregnancy impacts the baby, and the potential link between ADHD and endocrine disruptors The biggest everyday sources of chemical exposure, from kitchen items to fragrance, cosmetics, and laundry Should we all be filtering our drinking water?? Which low-tox swaps to prioritize first How to improve the air quality in your home How long does it take for these positive lifestyle changes to show in health testing? How to increase glutathione, your body’s natural detoxification system This is the sensationalism-and-fear-free conversation about plastics that we all need as we strive for progress over perfection. Follow Dr. Yvonne: https://dryvonneburkart.com/ instagram.com/dryvonneburkart Dr. Yvonne's YouTube Channel Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
Do you ever feel numb, like you're sleep-walking through life in zombie mode? You might be in functional freeze. Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from one of our guests that you might have missed. We're diving into polyvagal theory, how to recognize when you’re stuck in functional freeze (a lot of people are!), and how to use somatic tools and nervous system mapping to heal both your mind and body. If you're looking to effectively regulate your nervous system, overcome dissociative tendencies, and feel present in your life, this is a must-listen. We’re joined by Beatriz Victoria Albina, NP, MPH, SEP, a Family Nurse Practitioner, Somatic Experiencing and Breathwork Practitioner, and Master Certified Somatic Life Coach. Bea unpacks the hidden cost of emotional outsourcing™, AKA the survival habit of looking to others for validation, self-worth, and emotional regulation, instead of tuning into yourself. Listen to the full episode with Bea here. Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes. Follow Bea's Instagram and podcast. Buy Bea's book End Emotional Outsourcing! For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
We're baaaaack! Season 6 is here, we've rebranded, and we’re going deeper. I'm so excited to share everything we have in store this season — it's going to be less about finding the “right” answers, and more about asking better questions. We’re talking about self-discovery, relationships, identity, change and uncertainty, health, purpose, communication, and what it actually means to build a life that feels like your own. I'm kicking things off by sharing the mini identity crisis I had this summer about how I'm showing up in the world, if the way I'm spending my time is aligned with the person I want to be, and the questions I explored to reflect on how I want to move forward. So today, I’m sharing six prompts to help you gain clarity and insight into how you want to live, where you are right now, and what might have gotten lost along the way. Tune in to explore: How do I want to be remembered? Is there a gap between the person you want to be and how you're actually showing up? Who are you when no one is looking? Do you like the person you are when you’re alone and no one is watching? What version of yourself do you miss? What parts of your younger self might be worth reconnecting with? What will you miss about this chapter of your life? How can remembering that your current life will eventually become a memory help you appreciate the present? What is your insecurity trying to tell you? Are insecurity, envy, and comparison clues that you’re living out of alignment or self-abandoning? What stories are you still telling yourself? And what would happen if you started gathering evidence that those stories aren’t necessarily true? This episode is an invitation to pause, reflect, and reverse-engineer your life around these potent questions. Grab a journal, take a walk, or discuss these prompts with someone you love. You might discover something you already knew but had forgotten. Welcome to Season 6. I’m so happy you’re here! For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
A quick update to let you know we're taking a summer break from the podcast — we’ll be back with SEASON 6 in September! I'm so excited to share what's in store for Season 6... we have lots of exciting updates, a new look and feel, and deeper convos with brilliant and thoughtful guests. In the meantime, you can stay up-to-date by subscribing to the show on YouTube and Spotify to watch all the episodes... leaving a review really is such a helpful way to support the show so I can keep making this every week! And if you haven’t subscribed to my Substack, it would mean the world if you did. I’ll be posting more writing and insights there in the coming weeks. Thank you guys for tuning in to season 5 and being a part of this amazing community. If you have any topics or guest suggestions that you’d love to hear in season 6, please send me a message or DM. I love hearing from you! I hope you all find time for whimsy, community, and the hobbies that light you up this summer. See you in September! Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
Finally… a happiness habit that actually works. Whimsymaxxing is everywhere right now, and for good reason. But this is more than just another internet trend… the vitality of whimsy reflects something much deeper about what so many of us are craving. In this episode, we're exploring the psychology of whimsy, why adults desperately need more play, wonder, novelty, creativity, and delight, and why intentionally romanticizing your life can improve your mental health, resilience, and overall wellbeing. In a world obsessed with productivity, optimization, and hustle culture, whimsy is becoming an act of rebellion. A much-needed pendulum swing away from over-optimizing, biohacking, irreverence, and minimalism. Whimsy is an act of hope and joy against the seriousness of adulthood and the uncertainty of current times. And it’s more than just vibes… whimsy is a measurable psychological strength associated with greater life satisfaction, stronger relationships, improved resilience, and lower symptoms of depression. Even more good news: it’s not a fixed trait. Research shows playfulness can be learned and developed. So whether you're feeling burnt out, stuck in autopilot, or wanting to reconnect with childhood joy, this episode will inspire you to reclaim the magic of life in small, meaningful ways. Tune in to hear about: Why whimsymaxxing is becoming one of the biggest trends The psychology of whimsy, playfulness, and wonder How romanticizing your life can improve happiness and mental health Why novelty activates dopamine and makes life feel richer and more memorable The surprising research on adult playfulness and resilience The power of nostalgia and reconnecting with childhood joy How to break out of autopilot and make everyday life feel magical again 15 easy ways to add more whimsy, creativity, adventure, and play into your life this summer Let’s savour every sunset, dilly dally our days away, and spend the summer being wildly impractical and frivolous. For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
How do we make ourselves indispensable in a workforce where we're constantly being replaced? Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from one of our guests that you might have missed. In this uncertain job market, the things that make you uniquely you — like your ideas, communication skills and emotional intelligence — are becoming increasingly important for career success. So we're throwing it back to this helpful advice from Emily The Recruiter on how to incorporate AI into your job to stand out, and the soft skills that will make you irreplaceable in the current market. Plus, Emily myth-busts how much of our authentic self we should actually bring to work. Emily Durham—aka Emily the Recruiter—is a career coach, content creator, and host of the Clock In Podcast. With millions of views across TikTok, Instagram, and YouTube, Emily is known for her no-BS advice on how to land your dream job and deal with workplace dynamics like a boss.xn Listen to the full episode with Emily The Recruiter here. Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes. Check out our first episode with Emily here. Follow Emily on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
More than half of marriages end in divorce… so why do we still choose to tie the knot? In this episode we get profound relationship advice from a perspective you might not expect… a world-renowned divorce lawyer and authority on relationships. Because there’s a lot that we can reverse engineer from someone who has spent their career witnessing endings. We're joined by James Sexton, America's top divorce lawyer, and bestselling author of How to Stay in Love and How Not To Fuck Up Your Marriage. After more than 20 years helping couples navigate the end of their marriages, James has rare insight into what actually causes relationships to fail, and how we can build stronger, healthier, lasting love before the start. We cover the real reason people divorce, the biggest mistakes that end marriages, what the red flags are that a relationship might be unsalvageable, emotional disconnection and the toxicity of social media for couples, and advice for anyone about to get married. In this moving conversation, we also explore the deeper philosophy of grief and impermanence, and what we can learn about building more connected relationships from someone who has witnessed a lifetime of endings. Whether you're dating, engaged, married, navigating relationship challenges, or simply want to become a better partner, this episode is packed with practical relationship advice that every couple (and anyone hoping to get married one day) should hear. Tune in to hear: The main causes of divorce after 20+ years in family law How we “lose the plot” in relationships The red flags that a relationship is breaking down or beyond repair Why couples’ connections “go bankrupt slowly, then all at once" James Sexton’s "Hit Send Now" philosophy for honest communication Check-in rituals and habits to stay connected and avoid drifting Why couples experience different versions of the same relationship (we’re unreliable narrators!) How social media can be damaging in modern relationships What grief work and divorce law taught James about love, gratitude, and impermanence The most important advice James gives to anyone about to get married Follow James: https://www.instagram.com/nycdivorcelawyer/?hl=en https://www.youtube.com/@sextonshow/videos https://www.nycdivorces.com/ Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
How do we choose love over fear when relationships get hard? Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from an episode that you might have missed. This advice from Trevor Hanson will guide you through common communication landmines, why fear is the #1 killer of relationships, and how to move through fear by accessing our primary emotions and communicating without self-protection. I’m joined by Trevor Hanson, a marriage and family therapist who has helped thousands of individuals and couples heal attachment wounds and build secure, connected, confident relationships. His work has been featured by the Gottman Institute, and he’s the founder of The Art of Healing, where he teaches frameworks for transforming insecurity into emotional safety. Listen to our full episode with Trevor here. Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes. Follow Trevor on Instagram Trevor's website: https://theartofhealingbytrevor.com For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
What if this summer was your most social summer ever? We desperately need connection. Loneliness impacts your body, mood, longevity and emotional health, and as we turn to technology more and more for all our needs, we risk missing the social interactions that fuel us. So today we're throwing it back to the concept of the “social biome” — your personal ecosystem of relationships and daily interactions — and how it can enrich your life. Founded by researchers Dr. Jeffrey Hall and Dr. Andy Merolla, the social biome is a framework for strengthening relationships and cultivating a real sense of community in a culture that’s starved of real life connection. If you're craving more genuine relationships and social connection this summer, these doable strategies can help you build your social biome and connections. Tune in to learn: Why connection is “social nutrition” and how to feed your social health every day. The Ladder of Connection framework to move from restorative solitude to strong, meaningful friendships. How small, low-stakes interactions (“weak ties”) boost your mood and help you feel less isolated. Using social media and technology as a way to connect rather than compare and consume. Practical tips to actually make friends as an adult, nurture existing bonds, and create a supportive community. For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
How do we communicate our needs in a way that doesn't feel like criticism? Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from an episode that you might have missed. Expressing our true desires, communicating what actually makes us feel good or safe, and dialling into our preferences and needs can be vulnerable territory with a partner... but it's a powerful path to intimacy when done with care. So we're throwing it back to this masterclass in feedback, communication, and relating more intimately with Darshana Avila. Darshana is a trauma-informed somatic sex educator and Erotic Wholeness coach who has dedicated her career to helping people tune in to their truth, desires, and authentic relationships. Her work has been featured on Netflix’s Sex, Love & goop, and she’s spent over a decade guiding people out of the cultural patterns that keep them stuck. Listen to our full episode with Darshana here. Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes. Follow Darshana on her website and Instagram. For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
Do you feel like you're in the driver's seat of your life, or does it feel like life is just happening to you? Empowered people have an infectious confidence and energy, and a lot of that personal agency comes down to a powerful concept in psychology: locus of control. Do our choices, habits, and actions shape our future? Or are we at the mercy of luck, circumstances, other people, and forces beyond our control? Your answer has a major impact on your confidence, resilience, motivation, mental health, relationships, success, and optimism. In this episode, we unpack the difference between an internal locus of control and an external locus of control, why some people feel empowered while others feel stuck, and how our childhood experiences, upbringing, and life circumstances can shape the stories we tell ourselves about what's possible. Tune in to hear: What the concept of locus of control is in psychology The difference between an internal vs. external locus of control Why locus of control influences confidence, resilience, happiness, motivation, and success The connection between external locus of control and anxiety/depression/stress How high performers often develop a stronger sense of personal agency How childhood experiences, parenting styles, and socioeconomic circumstances shape our beliefs Why your locus of control may differ across areas of your life Strategies to feel more empowered and build confidence in your abilities Whether you're navigating anxiety, building self-confidence, or trying to feel more empowered in your life, this is a powerful framework for understanding how your mindset shapes your reality. I believe in you!! For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
What if burnout isn't always caused by working too much? I've been falling back into burnout lately, and a lot of people around me have been struggling with it too. So in this throwback episode, we're exploring a lesser-known cause of burnout that rarely gets discussed: a lack of meaning, purpose, connection, engagement, and fulfillment. Most burnout advice focuses on reducing stress, taking breaks, and improving work-life balance... but tons of people are still experiencing chronic fatigue, emotional exhaustion, and low motivation even after taking a break and getting more rest. That's because burnout isn't always about overwork. Sometimes it's about undernourishment. Enter "boreout": the exhaustion that comes from chronic disengagement, lack of purpose, misalignment with your values, and not having enough meaningful experiences, relationships, creativity, or excitement in your life. Tune in to hear about: • The other cause of burnout that most people overlook • Why burnout isn't always caused by stress, overwork, or long hours • How a lack of meaning, purpose, and engagement can create chronic exhaustion • The connection between values misalignment and burnout symptoms • How technology, overstimulation, and constant productivity impact mental health • Why rest alone doesn't always fix burnout • Practical ways to create more energy, joy, creativity, purpose, and fulfillment • How to recover from burnout by building a life that energizes you Sometimes the answer isn't doing less... it's reconnecting with what makes you feel alive. For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
Rethinking drinking? You're not the only one. Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from an episode that you might have missed. We all know alcohol messes with our health, but do you know how much it gets in the way of real connection? We're throwing it back to a deep chat with Amanda Kuda on how alcohol impacts our confidence, energy, social lives and more. Tune in to find out if you fall into the moderators vs. abstainers archetype, and how to realistically change your relationship with booze. Amanda is an alcohol-free life coach, speaker, and author of Unbottled Potential: Break Up With Alcohol and Break Through to Your Best Life. Amanda teaches a modern, empowering approach to personal development and self-actualization through the lens of elective sobriety—no rock bottom necessary. Whether you’re looking to cut back, reassess your relationship with drinking, or explore what an alcohol-free lifestyle could do for your energy, confidence, dating life, and emotional wellbeing, Amanda offers tons of vulnerability and insight. Listen to our full episode with Amanda here. Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes. Follow Amanda: https://www.amandakuda.com/ For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
You have friends… so why do you still feel lonely? Friendships are more important than ever in adulthood, but they become increasingly hard to make and maintain. But we’re in a real loneliness epidemic where most adults feel unseen, alone, and disconnected *even though* they have lots of connections in their lives. The real reason no one’s talking about? The “depth gap” that keeps us from being truly vulnerable and connected. Because the problem isn't always that we need more friends… it's that we don't feel known by the people in our lives. In this episode, we're diving into the psychology of modern friendship with psychologist Dr. Elisabeth Crain. From attachment styles and friendship patterns to reciprocity, resentment, and friendship breakups, this interview is a roadmap for healthier, more fulfilling friendships. Tune in to hear: • Why adult friendships are harder to build and maintain • The "Depth Gap" and why loneliness is often a quality issue, not a quantity issue • How fear of vulnerability and rejection impact intimacy • Attachment styles in friendships • Understanding your friendship blueprint and relationship patterns • Fast-burn versus slow-burn friendships… why pacing matters • Managing reciprocity, imbalance and resentment • The importance of healthy criticism • Tuning into your body’s reaction to people • The art of discernment in picking the right friendships • Why friendships fracture in adulthood Follow Dr. Elisabeth Crain: https://www.drelisabethcrain.com/ https://www.instagram.com/dr.elisabeth.crain Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from past episodes that you might have missed. Why is catastrophizing and emotional spirals so common in ADHD? We're throwing it back to this helpful advice from ADHD coach Shanna Pearson, on her easy go-to trick to manage mood and strong emotional reactions in the moment. Shanna is the founder of the world’s largest one-on-one ADHD coaching company, working with thousands of adults with ADHD every year, and the bestselling author of Invisible ADHD. Follow Shannon and check out her book: https://www.adhdcoaching.com/ https://www.invisibleadhd.com/ Listen to our full episode here. Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes. For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
What you resist really does persist… and the anxiety-avoidance cycle can keep you trapped in a small life for years. If you avoid social situations, difficult conversations, travel, dating, decision-making, presentations, or anything that makes you anxious, this episode is for you. Avoidance is one of the most common coping mechanisms people use for anxiety… but it's also one of the biggest reasons anxiety continues to grow. And the problem with avoidance is you can’t stop thinking about something that you’re trying to avoid. In today’s episode, we're unpacking the psychology of avoidance and how it ultimately reinforces fear, shrinks your comfort zone, and keeps you stuck. Tune in if you want to learn how to face your fears, build confidence in your ability to deal with stress, and live a more expansive life. We cover: Why avoidance is one of the most common coping strategies The anxiety-avoidance cycle and how it feeds anxiety Why avoiding difficult conversations creates more stress than just having them Internal avoidance: avoiding thoughts, uncertainty, decisions, and emotions How avoidance can shrink your world and limit your opportunities How Metacognitive Therapy approaches anxiety and avoidance Building tolerance for uncertainty and discomfort Using gradual exposure: the "fear ladder" Prompts to change how you think about your anxiety The Fear List exercise that helped me get unstuck If you've been feeling trapped by anxiety, fear, and avoidance, this episode is your reminder that discomfort is not dangerous… and life usually expands on the other side of the things we're afraid of. For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
Do you know your sexual personality type? Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from an episode that you might have missed. If you like personality tests and frameworks like Myers Briggs, learning your sexual profile can make a huge difference in your sex life. We're throwing it back to this helpful segment from TikTok’s #1 sex educator, Dr. Tara, on how to know if you and your partner are sexually compatible, what to do if you have different sexual preferences, and the key to connecting in bed if you have different sexual personality types. Dr. Tara is a certified sexologist, award-winning researcher, tenured professor of relational and sexual communication, TV host, radio host, a coach and the Internet’s Resident Sex Expert. She’s the host of Luvbites Podcast that focuses on sexual wellness and sexploration, and she just released her new book, How Do You Like It? A Guide for Getting What You Want (in Bed). Listen to the full episode here! Take the Sexual Profile Quiz: https://www.luvbites.co/quizzes/whats-your-sexual-profile Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes. Follow Dr. Tara on TikTok and Instagram Get Dr. Tara’s new book, How Do You Like It Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
If you’re listening to this episode, chances are you or someone you love is struggling with a hormonal, inflammatory, reproductive, or chronic pain condition like endometriosis or PCOS/PMOS… I know firsthand how exhausting and frustrating it can be to get proper care, and how much these conditions can impact your life, from pain and fertility struggles, to metabolism issues, bloating, and the impact on your physical and mental health. The good news? Women’s health conversations are finally starting to change around conditions that have historically been dismissed, minimized, or misunderstood. In this episode, I’m joined by renowned gynecologist and gynecologic surgeon Dr. Karen Tang to unpack the truth about endometriosis and PCOS (now more accurately named PMOS — Polyendocrine Metabolic Ovarian Syndrome. This interview is packed with validating, practical, and empowering information that every woman deserves to hear. We dive deep into the symptoms, root causes, inflammation, hormones, fertility struggles, diagnosis delays, treatment options, and evidence-based lifestyle interventions that can actually help women living with these issues. Dr. Tang explains why endometriosis is far more than “bad period pain,” how it can affect the entire body, and why it often takes women an average of 7–11 years to receive a diagnosis. We also cover PCOS/PMOS as a metabolic and hormonal disorder (not just a fertility condition) including insulin resistance, blood sugar dysregulation, and long-term health risks. Dr. Tang is a leader in reproductive health, has taught medical students and residents at institutions like Harvard and University of Pennsylvania, and she reaches millions of viewers on her social media channels where she explains gynaecology, pelvic pain, and reproductive rights. She’s the author of It’s Not Hysteria, Everything You Need To Know About Your Reproductive Health (But Were Never Told). Tune in to learn about: The signs and symptoms of endometriosis and PCOS/PMOS Why women’s pain is so often normalized or dismissed in healthcare The stages and severity of endometriosis Common triggers for endometriosis flare-ups Anti-inflammatory diets, supplements, and lifestyle changes that may help Fertility considerations for women with endometriosis and/or PCOS Why doctors prescribe birth control as a treatment Non-hormonal treatment options that can help address the root cause How to advocate for yourself when doctors dismiss your symptoms Follow Dr. Tang: https://thrivegyn.com/ https://www.instagram.com/karentangmd/?hl=en Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from one of our guests that you might have missed. What you eat has a huge impact on your mood, energy and hormones. Here to advise on how our nutrition and eating habits affect hormonal imbalances and metabolism, we have Amber Romaniuk. Amber is an Emotional Eating, Digestive and Hormone Expert, with 10 years experience helping women create body confidence, intuition and optimal health through mindset healing, self-care and overcoming self-sabotage with food. Her podcast “The No Sugarcoating Podcast” has over a million downloads. Amber overcame her own emotional eating journey after gaining and losing more than 1000 lbs combined and spending 5 years balancing her hormones and digestion. Now she helps others achieve Body Freedom so they can experience true confidence and health. Listen to our full episode with Amber here. Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes. Follow Amber: https://amberapproved.ca https://instagram.com/amberromaniuk https://amberapproved.ca/podcast/ https://www.youtube.com/@amberromaniuk For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
May is mental health awareness month, so I've gone back and pulled the top tips and advice from neuroscientists, psychologists and biohacking experts on how to improve your happiness, anxiety, and depression through specific supplement protocols, brain health hacks, and healing your gut. Because we can't ignore the physical side to mental health, and taking care of our bodies is a key piece in taking care of our minds. Tune in to hear about: Our mood has EVERYTHING to do with our brain health. So what do top neuroscientists recommend for psychiatric issues? Dr. Kristen Willeumier offers her EXACT protocol for improving anxiety without a medical prescription. This is game-changing advice on the power of supplements for managing anxiety and psychiatric disorders, from an award-winning neuroscientist with a PHD and Masters in neurobiology, Masters in Physiological science, and postdoctoral scientist in the Department of Neurology at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in LA. Your gut can play a huge role in your mental health (95% of the serotonin in our body is housed in the gut!). Clinical psychologist, author, and founder of Heartship Psychological Services, Dr. Lauren Cook, breaks down what tests and bloodwork to get, the supplements that changed her brain, and how gut health is intrinsically linked to mental health. If you're struggling with persistent low mood and energy, this surprising supplement recommendation from chemical engineer and biohacking pro Chloe Deutscher could be the answer. Learn why certain supplements and vitamins can help with depression, calm anxiety, and boost your serotonin. For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
May is mental health awareness month, so we’re rounding up some of the most game-changing advice and insights we've heard on the podcast about managing anxiety and improving your emotional wellbeing, from three leading experts. We cover the root cause of anxiety and the beliefs that fuel it, managing our distress with the “anxiety hierarchy”, and the ways trauma is stored in the body — along with how to move it. These perspective-changing concepts have really helped me better understand my mind and improve my mindset. Tune in to hear advice from: Clinical Psychologist Sunniva Itland, founder of one of Norway's largest private psychology clinics and co-founder of metacognitivetherapy.com: On the root of our anxiety, and the transformative anti-therapy therapy that's changing lives. Dr. Lauren Cook, therapist, consultant, speaker, author and founder of Heartship Psychological Services: On the framework that helps you measure your level of anxiety when faced with challenges, so you can live your life without letting anxiety, avoidance, and control stay in the driver's seat. Trauma Therapist Simone Saunders, somatic psychotherapist and founder of The Cognitive Corner: On signs that you’re chronically dysregulated, nervous system regulation tools that help or hinder, and how trauma manifests physically. If you’re struggling with your mental health, you’re not alone. Please tell someone… and know that you are loved. For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
It’s mental health awareness month, so we're throwing it back to this powerful framework to help manage your mental health. Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from one of our guests that you might have missed. We break down a simple, practical framework that helps you reset your mental health from the ground up: the Life Force Pyramid, developed by Jonah Hill's therapist, psychiatrist Phil Stutz. The method builds on the three levels that are key for our emotional wellbeing: our relationship with our body, relationships with others, and our relationship with self. This simple pyramid can be a real game-changing check-in when you feel your mental wellness start to slip. If you’re looking for an actionable way to take back control of your mental health and improve your vitality, this gives you a tool you can start using immediately. Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes. For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
It’s Mental Health Awareness Month — and while we’ve covered emotional and mental wellbeing a lot on the podcast, we’ve never explored complex mental health disorders and how to navigate them. Our culture talks endlessly about therapy, but I don’t see enough conversations about how to help those struggling with severe mental illness. Because it doesn’t always look like venting to your therapist and unpacking childhood trauma. For many people, the issue isn’t a lack of self-awareness or needing to dive deeper into their feelings. It’s a lack of tools to manage what’s happening in real time. So, whether you’re struggling with a mental health condition, or this is impacting someone you care about, we’re deepening our understanding of personality disorders like Narcissism and Borderline Personality Disorder, Bipolar Disorder, and the tools that can help people who are really struggling. With the help of Dr. Suzanne Wallach, we explore how approaches like Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) can shift the focus from why you feel this way to what you do when you feel this way so you have concrete skills, like emotional regulation and distress tolerance — even when you’re triggered. Dr. Wallach is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in California with a Master’s Degree in Clinical Psychology and Doctorate in Psychology. She’s a Dialectical Behaviour Therapy expert who works with personality disorders like Borderline, substance abuse and addiction, eating disorders, and complex trauma. She’s been on podcasts like Call Her Daddy, and is a wealth of knowledge when it comes to treating complex conditions with compassion and skills-based techniques. Tune in to learn: The truth about Narcissistic Personality Disorder and the trauma that leads to it Signs you might be dating a narcissist Understanding Borderline Personality Disorder How to be in relationship with people who have personality disorders The difference between Type 1 and Type 2 Bipolar Disorder When medication is needed, and the different modalities that can help How Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) offers real-world tools for people with mental disorders Why sequencing and developing distress tolerance in therapy matters more than most people realize When to do psychodynamic/psychoanalytic therapy VS behavioural techniques The difference between between DBT, CBT, and MCT If you’ve ever felt like talk therapy made you more self-aware but didn’t actually change your destructive patterns or improve a mental disorder, this episode might help with a new approach. Wherever you are in your mental health journey, know that you are not alone, and there’s life-changing help available. Connect with Dr. Suzanne Wallach: https://suzannewallach.com/ https://www.instagram.com/drsuzannewallach/ For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
In honour of Mental Health Awareness Month, we're revisiting some powerful insights from IN-Q on the connection between creativity, expression, and mental wellness. Welcome to this week’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from one of our guests that you might have missed. If you’ve been struggling with anxiety, burnout, loneliness, or emotional overwhelm, this conversation explores how creative expression, vulnerability, and storytelling can become powerful tools for healing and resilience. We talk about the deeper causes behind the current mental health crisis, and a new, realistic perspective on happiness and fulfillment. IN-Q is an Emmy-nominated poet, multi-platinum songwriter, world renowned keynote speaker, best-selling author of Inquire Within and The Never Ending Now Poetry journal. IN-Q has written songs with artists like Selena Gomez, Miley Cyrus and Mike Posner, and he was named to Oprah's SuperSoul 100 list of the world's most influential thought leaders. He hosts writing workshops around the world, and works with brands like Nike, Spotify, Google and Lululemon to help their teams tell their stories and find their authentic voice. Follow IN-Q on Instagram and his website in-q.com. Get IN-Q's book Inquire Within and The Never Ending Now Poetry Journal. Listen to our full episode here! Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
If you’ve been feeling constantly exhausted, burned out, or mentally drained, even after you’ve caught up on sleep…this episode is for you. Because sometimes we’re tired in ways sleep alone can’t fix. Today’s truth-bomb: sleep and rest are not the same thing. And most chronically drained people are missing the kind of rest that would actually restore them. In today’s quickie, we’re breaking down the 4 types of fatigue that could be draining your energy — and why most people are trying to fix the wrong problem. This will help you identify why you’re so tired all the time, and what actually works to feel better. Backed by research, fatigue is a multidimensional experience, and until you address the specific type of exhaustion you’re experiencing, no amount of sleep, coffee, or productivity hacks will fix it. Tune in to hear about: The 4 main types of fatigue: physical, cognitive (mental overload), emotional, and existential Why doomscrolling, screen time, and constant stimulation are worsening your exhaustion Active vs passive mental fatigue (and why both leave you drained) How people-pleasing and unreciprocated emotional labor lead to deep exhaustion Why you need to close those “open mental tabs” with monotasking How to reduce digital overload and give your brain real rest Why monotasking and closing mental loops can instantly improve focus and energy The power of awe, purpose, and gratitude in reversing existential burnout For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
Do you ever feel like you’re behind in life? Like everyone else is hitting milestones while you’re stuck waiting for your life to finally begin? Whether it’s your career, relationships, finances, or major life milestones, this episode dives into the psychology of feeling behind, comparison, and the pressure of the invisible timeline we all think we’re supposed to follow. From your late 20s into your 30s and beyond, it can feel like a race: finding a partner, advancing your career, buying a home, starting a family. And if you’re not there yet, It’s easy to spiral. But there’s no correct cadence to life. We become so obsessed with hitting that next milestone we completely miss the beauty of the stage we’re in right now. If you’ve ever thought: “I should be further along by now” or “It’s too late to start over”… this episode is for you. Tune in to hear: Why you feel behind in life (and the psychology behind it) How comparison and social media distort your timeline The cost of chasing milestones and “the arrival fallacy” Practical ways to stop comparing yourself to others How to bring what you’re craving (love, kids, success) into your life right now Remember, your life isn’t on hold.., It’s happening right now. For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from one of our guests that you might have missed. In honor of Earth Day and Earth Month, we’re revisiting one of our most practical and empowering conversations on sustainable living, reducing waste, and lowering your carbon footprint—without falling into the trap of perfectionism. We break down how to reduce plastic use, what actually matters when it comes to recycling, and simple swaps that can significantly reduce your waste and carbon footprint over time. If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed trying to live more sustainably, cut out plastic, or make eco-friendly choices in a world built on convenience and overconsumption, this is your realistic, no-guilt guide to sustainability. Because sustainability isn’t about being perfect—it’s about making better choices consistently. Julia is a TV personality, entrepreneur, fashion designer, former international model, and founder of the incredible Preloved, North America’s leading sustainable fashion brand that has diverted over a million sweaters from landfills. She’s CityLine’s eco expert and regularly appears on Global News and in Canada’s biggest media outlets. Her mission is to show people how simple changes, over time, can have a huge impact, and she’s showing the world how we can take an eco-friendly approach to home design, health, food, fashion and lifestyle. Listen to the full episode here. Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes. Follow Julia: @prelovedjules juliagrieve.ca getpreloved.com Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
Modern dating feels like a shitshow, and if you’re struggling to find love, burnt out by dating apps, or wondering why dating feels harder than ever… this episode is for you. In part 2 of our conversation with relationship expert Amy Chan, we’re diving into how to date smarter, overcome toxic dating patterns, and build healthy relationships that actually last. Amy breaks down why the modern dating landscape feels so dysfunctional (half of US singles went on ZERO dates last year), the difference in modern gender dynamics, biggest mistakes singles are making, and how to stop self-sabotaging your love life. We also explore the truth about chemistry vs compatibility, why instant sparks aren’t always a green flag, and how to recognize when your “type” may actually be keeping you stuck. Amy has been a trusted voice in modern relationships for almost two decades. She’s the author of UNSINGLE: How to Date Smarter and Create Love that Lasts (which comes out this April 28th!) and her popular first book, Breakup Bootcamp: The Science of Rewiring Your Heart, was featured in The New York Times. She’s the founder Renew Breakup Bootcamp, the world's first heartbreak retreat, and she’s on faculty at Esalen and The Omega Institute. If you’ve ever wondered whether you’re being too picky and expecting perfection, or struggling to know if someone is “the one,” this conversation is a science-backed no-bullshit guide to navigating dating with confidence and emotional intelligence. We cover: Why dating feels broken right now How dating apps and social media have changed relationships The biggest self-sabotaging dating patterns people fall into Amy’s Dating Funnel framework for getting unstuck Have we become “ick”-obsessed assholes? How much chemistry matters early on What you might not realize about your “type” The debate of going slow VS fast in dating The real green flags and red flags that predict lasting love What actually creates healthy, sustainable relationships This is part TWO of a two-part series with Amy Chan! If you’re going through a breakup and missed part one, be sure to go back and listen here. Follow Amy on Instagram and her website. You can order her new book, Unsingle, here. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
Welcome to our new weekly series, ICYMI, where we start off the week with a quick game-changing tip from one of our guests that you might have missed. Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes. Today, we’re throwing it back to one of our most valuable 2022 finance interviews with Nicole Victoria to help guide us through recession fears, market volatility, and economic uncertainty. If you’ve been wondering whether you should buy the dip, sell your stocks, or pause investing when the market crashes, this episode is packed with advice on how to recession-proof your money and make smarter long-term financial decisions. Nicole breaks down why so many people lose money in recessions and the biggest investing mistakes to avoid when panic sets in. Whether you’re a beginner investor trying to understand recession investing strategies like dollar cost averaging, or feeling anxious about these uncertain times... this ICYMI is a great starting point. Nicole is a CEO, money coach and financial literacy advocate Nicole Victoria AKA No Budget Babe, who specializes in helping millennial and gen-z women effortlessly manage their money and build bank accounts that never stop growing. Listen to our full episode with Nicole Victoria here! Follow Nicole: No Budget Babe Instagram: @Nobudgetbabe TikTok: @nobudgetbabe Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
Breaking up is hard to do… we’ve watched hundreds of movies and listened to thousands of songs about the universal experience of heartbreak — yet no one ever really teaches us how to navigate breakups, let go of love, and move on in a healthy way. So today, we called in the breakup pro: I’m joined by relationship expert, author, and founder of Renew Breakup Bootcamp, Amy Chan, to cover the psychology of breakups, why we stay in the wrong relationships, and how to actually heal after heartbreak without losing yourself in the process. Amy offers a scientific approach to healing the heart, revealing what actually happens in your brain during a breakup, and why heartbreak and situationships can take on an addictive quality. Amy has been a trusted voice in modern relationships for almost two decades. She’s the author of UNSINGLE: How to Date Smarter and Create Love that Lasts (which comes out this April 28th!) and her popular first book, Breakup Bootcamp: The Science of Rewiring Your Heart, was featured in The New York Times. She’s the founder Renew Breakup Bootcamp, the world's first heartbreak retreat, and she’s on faculty at Esalen and The Omega Institute. Whether you’re in the “should I stay or should I go” phase, currently going through a fresh breakup, or ready to move on from an ex, this conversation will give you the clarity, actionable tools, and perspective you need to come out stronger on the other side. Tune in to hear more about: How to know when it’s time to break up (even when nothing is “wrong”) The 4 key pillars of a healthy relationship to assess compatibility Why we stay in unfulfilling or dead-end relationships The psychology of heartbreak and emotional withdrawal Is it easier to initiate the breakup or be broken up with? The biggest breakup mistakes Why you need to stop creeping your ex on social media Why breakups and situationships can feel addictive and how to stop toxic patterns Why we romanticize our exes (the rose-coloured glasses effect) Can you stay friends with an ex? The rules around post-breakup contact How to set boundaries that support healing and closure This is part one of a two-part series with Amy Chan! If you’re ready to start dating again, don’t miss next week’s episode on how to date smarter and build healthier, lasting relationships. Follow Amy on Instagram and her website. You can order her new book, Unsingle, here. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
Feeling stuck in your career, burnt out, or questioning if it’s time to quit? This episode is for anyone navigating a career pivot or craving more purpose and fulfillment in their work We’re joined by career coach, author, and former Google executive Megan Hellerer to unpack how to find an aligned career and make confident decisions about your next chapter. We explore the truth behind the Achievement Lie, and why so many millennials feel anxious, lost, and burned out despite being successful. You’ll learn the difference between your “fear self” and your “true self,” why logic alone won’t lead you to the right decisions, and how to start making decisions based on what actually feels aligned. After doing everything “right” — graduating from Stanford, landing a high-powered role at Google — Megan found herself deeply unfulfilled and ultimately quit away with no plan. She went on to develop her now widely recognized framework, Directional Living®, and wrote a popular book with the same name, helping ambitious but disconnected high-achievers (like Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez!) rebuild careers that actually feel good. Tune in for more on: The “Achievement Lie” and how it keeps you stuck How to know when it’s time to quit your job (vs. making changes to stick it out) The difference between burnout from overwork vs burnout from misalignment How to tap into your intuition and inner navigation system The difference between your fear self vs true self in decision-making Practical exercises to uncover what actually lights you up (even if you feel lost) Why your curiosity and joy are so helpful How to overcome fear, uncertainty, and decision paralysis The 4 decision-making “omens” to avoid Why there’s no single “right” career path — only what’s right for you right now For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from one of our guests that you might have missed. I'm moving this week, and in preparation, I've been listening back to our episode on organization so I can put systems in place to (finally!) start my new home with an organized framework. For anyone itching to spring clean or tackle that "problem area" of your home, we’re throwing it back to the top questions to ask during your decluttering journey, neuroscience hacks to make organization a habit, and the psychology behind how you approach your belongings, with Megan Golightly. Megan is a professional home organizer and founder of Simplified, which helps people organize, pack and unpack their homes. Megan blends her degree in psychology and passion for neuroscience research with practical organization strategies. Listen to our full episode with Megan Golightly here. Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes. Follow Megan: go-simplified.com @gosimplified/ Organization Guides: go-simplified.com/guides Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
What if the biggest predictor of success isn’t talent... but grit? According to psychologist Angela Duckworth, grit is: Passion + perseverance for long-term goals. It’s the ability to stay committed, even when things feel hard or uncertain. As Winston Churchill said: “Success is stumbling from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm.” In today's quickie, we’re breaking down the psychology of grit, and why your ability to stay consistent matters more than IQ, natural ability, or connections. If you’ve ever felt behind, not “naturally gifted,” or unsure of your potential... this episode will reframe everything. Tune in to hear more about: Why grit is the #1 predictor of success Angela Duckworth's groundbreaking studies on success How to stop disqualifying yourself from your potential The link between grit, resilience, and mental toughness Why passion matters (and burnout happens without it) When to quit vs stick it out How to build grit in your own life The connection between grit and happiness If you want to measure your grit, you can take the official Grit Scale by Angela Duckworth: 👉 The Grit Scale Quiz ✨ I'm officially on Substack!!! It would mean the world if you could support my writing by subscribing to my Substack here! For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from past episodes that you might have missed. ADHD in adults is often missed or misdiagnosed... especially in women. We're throwing it back to this insightful info from ADHD coach Shanna Pearson, on the science and brain chemistry behind ADHD, the three types of ADHD and how symptoms differ drastically across gender, and why so many women are diagnosed with anxiety before discovering they have ADHD. Shanna Pearson is the founder of the world’s largest one-on-one ADHD coaching company, working with thousands of adults with ADHD every year, and the bestselling author of Invisible ADHD. Follow Shannon and check out her book: https://www.adhdcoaching.com/ https://www.invisibleadhd.com/ Listen to our full episode here. Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes. For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
What if your biggest self-sabotaging habits are actually the inverse of your love language? We’re diving into the psychology of "loathe languages", and how your unmet emotional needs might be showing up in your toxic traits. After seeing a viral idea about “loathe languages” (the shadow side of your love language), we’re unpacking how the very ways you need love might be the exact areas you unintentionally block it. If you find yourself defaulting to isolation, negative self-talk, avoidance, deprivation, or burnout, understanding and interrupting your 'loathe language' can help you better meet your needs before you spiral. Tune in to hear about: The connection between love languages and self-sabotaging behavior What your “loathe language” is and how it shows up in daily life Why quality time types may isolate or withdraw from loved ones How acts of service can turn into over-functioning, burnout, and refusing help The opposite side of physical touch (avoidance, disconnection, neglecting self-care) How words of affirmation can become harsh self-criticism and negative inner dialogue Why gift-giving/receiving can manifest as impulse spending or restriction Recognizing when you’re in a self-sabotage cycle How to meet your needs in healthier, more aligned ways For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
If the news is ruining your mental health, listen to this. News anxiety is at an all-time high as we’re bombarded with breaking headlines and social media coverage of... every single shitshow that's simultaneously unfolding globally. And unlike previous periods of unrest throughout history, it's all delivered straight to our phones, 24/7, for us to worry about. Washington D.C. therapist Steven Stosny coined the term "headline stress disorder" to describe the huge mental health impact of our nonstop news cycle. In this re-release, we explore how to stay informed and consume the news responsibly while protecting our mental health. Because we can't make an impact if we're operating in overwhelm and hopelessness. Tune in to hear more about: ✅ How the 24-hour news cycle fuels anxiety & fear-based algorithms ✅ Ways to stay informed without feeling emotionally drained ✅ How to break free from doomscrolling & social media-induced panic ✅ Practical strategies to set news boundaries & curate mindful media consumption ✅ Why focusing on what you CAN control is key to mental resilience ✅ The importance of hope & positive news for your mental well-being Looking for uplifting news sources? Check these out: ✨ Good Good Good ✨ Good News Movement ✨ Tank’s Good News 🔗 Read more on managing worry & anxiety at metacognitivetherapy.com. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from one of our guests that you might have missed. Money can be a major point of shame, anxiety, guilt, and avoidance for a lot of us, so we're throwing it back to this deep dive with financial expert Jessica Moorhouse on the psychology of money and how to heal your relationship with it, so you can stop toxic financial habits and rewire your money mindset. Jessica is a millennial money expert, speaker, Accredited Financial Counsellor Canada®, bestselling author of Everything but Money, host of the More Money Podcast, and a leading voice on personal finance and emotional literacy in financial wellness. Listen to our full episode with Jessica here. Check out Jessica's book, Everything but Money. Follow Jessica on Instagram, YouTube, and her website. Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes. For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
Did you know that happy people are less judgmental? Nobody likes being judged… and for the judgmental ones, it doesn’t feel good either. We’ve all been judgy, and the truth is, being overly critical of others is often linked to insecurity, anxiety, perfectionism, and unhappiness. Subscribe to my new Substack! In this week’s quickie, we’re unpacking the psychology of judgment: where it comes from, why we do it, and how to become less judgmental in a world that fuels comparison and criticism about everything from how we parent, to how we look, to how we earn and spend our money. Judgment usually says more about our own wounds than someone else’s behaviour. So we’re exploring the psychological drivers behind judging, and psychology-backed tools to shift into a more curious, understanding, and compassionate mindset. Tune in to hear: Why the ego needs to feel “right” The link between perfectionism and criticism How insecurity and comparison fuels judgment The connection between self-judgment and judging others Understanding the Fundamental Attribution Error The blind spots I’ve had to confront in my own judgments Using curiosity as the antidote to judgment Challenging your assumptions and biases Practicing self-compassion to reduce projection For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from past episodes that you might have missed. What achievement would feel like "enough" for you? Is there a level of success you'd ever be totally satisfied with? If you're an over-achiever that's always chasing what's next, this one's for you. We're throwing it back to this potent conversation with Leisse Wilcox, where we unpack the never-ending pursuit of more achievement, the 4 "P"s of self-sabotage (from perfectionism to people-pleasing) and how to actually feel like enough. Leisse is a keynote speaker, leadership consultant, performance coach, emotional intelligence expert and two-times best-selling author. Known as “the Marie Kondo of your Unconscious”, She helps clients and businesses turns self-sabotage into success in each of life's cornerstone areas, combining strategic consulting and therapeutic coaching tools. Follow Leisse on Instagram and check out her website. Read Leisse’s bestselling books, To Call Myself Beloved and Alone: The Truth + Beauty of Belonging. Listen to our full episode here. Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes. For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
Moving in with your partner? Before you sign the lease, you need to talk about money. As I prepare to move in with my partner for the first time (your girl’s growing up!), I revisited our practical and helpful conversation with personal finance expert and author, Alyssa Davies, about how to navigate your finances when you’re merging lives with your partner, and how to set yourself up for success when you’re moving in together. We dive into the financial conversations every couple should have before moving in — from how to split rent and household expenses when your income is different, to structuring joint finances in a way that feels equitable and aligned with your shared goals. Because merging lives means merging money — and that’s hella vulnerable. Alyssa Davies is a 2x author and the mastermind behind award-winning Canadian personal finance website and YouTube channel, Mixed Up Money, where she dishes out financial content for women who care about their money. Tune in to hear: Alyssa’s advice for couples who are moving in together The most important money conversations to have Different ways to structure your joint and separate accounts Equal vs equitable expense splitting (and how to divide rent when your incomes are different) How to protect your assets if your partner moves in What to do if you have different spending/saving habits Saving for big milestones together (travel, home, wedding, investments) Avoiding resentment around money and contribution Tools for successful budgeting with your partner Follow Alyssa: mixedupmoney.com/ instagram.com/mixedupmoney/ Alyssa's Budgeting Templates: mixedupmoney.com/shop For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
Welcome to today’s ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from one of our guests that you might have missed. Your to-do list Is lying to you… not everything is urgent, and productivity isn’t about doing more. It’s about doing what matters most. As Greg McKeown says: “When you prioritize the important over the urgent, you don’t just get more done, you get the right things done.” And that’s the difference between a busy life and a meaningful one. We’re throwing it back to 3 practical steps to master prioritization using principles from productivity minimalism and Essentialism. We cover the Law of Inverse Prioritization, and effective decision-making questions to filter every task and commitment. Listen to our full episode here. Resources mentioned: Greg McKeown’s Instagram video Greg’s book and academy on Essentialism Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
Feeling lost in your career? Questioning your life direction? So many of us spend our 20s and 30s chasing the job titles we’re told we “should” have, lofty income goals, or status, only to end up feeling disconnected, unfulfilled, and like we’ve sold our soul along the way. What if the answer to career clarity and job satisfaction isn’t ahead of you… it’s behind you? Research shows that people whose adult careers align with their early interests experience higher job satisfaction, better income, and greater educational attainment. If you loved writing, building, organizing, performing, asking questions, leading groups, solving problems, or creating things as a kid, those patterns can still guide what feels meaningful and easeful in adulthood. So in today’s episode, we explore how your childhood interests and your true nature as a kid can offer clues for what will bring you long-term career fulfillment — and why reconnecting with who you were as a child is an evidence-based career strategy. Tune in to hear about: Why so many adults feel lost or misaligned in their careers The disconnect between societal expectations and your authentic self How your childhood “essence” reveals your natural strengths Prompts to uncover your core nature The new research linking childhood interests to adult job satisfaction How interests are often more stable than personality traits Holland’s RIASEC career theory in the 6 interest categories How to use your younger self as a practical career compass For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
Do you ever struggle with shame, pain, numbness, or disconnection in your sex life? So many of us have done inner child work, attachment work, and therapy for our mental health — but we’ve never applied that same lens to our sexuality. Cultural conditioning, religious messaging, porn, performance pressure, trauma, and body shame all shape how safe (or unsafe) we feel in intimacy. And often, it’s our sexual selves that become fragmented. In this episode, I’m joined by trauma-informed somatic sex educator and Erotic Wholeness coach Darshana Avila (featured on Goop’s podcast and TV show) to explore how to heal sexual shame, navigating painful sex, ways to deepen intimacy, and confidently asking for the pleasure you actually want. Darshana has dedicated her career to helping people tune in to their truth, desires, and authentic relationships. Her work has been featured on Netflix’s Sex, Love & goop, and she’s spent over a decade guiding people out of the cultural patterns that keep them stuck. This conversation explores sex and the erotic not as performance, but as attunement, embodiment, and healing. Tune in to hear: What Erotic Wholeness actually means How trauma and upbringing impact desire and shutdown Why so many women experience painful sex — and what might be happening physiologically and emotionally Why orgasms can feel difficult or inconsistent How to feel more confident and comfortable in your body How to give feedback in bed without shame or conflict What to do when you “don’t even know what you like” How to slow down, build anticipation, and deepen attunement Why presence and nervous system regulation are key to better sex Follow Darshana on her website and Instagram. For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.